Day 154 - The Tail End

September 8th, 2015

Standard Canadian Houses
I woke up feeling like a building had collapsed on me. I haven’t worked out for over a month, then did quite a bit of activity and injury yesterday. Does a number on you! Going to bed last night, I hurt a bit, but it wasn’t that big of a deal. 

I pull myself out of bed to find I can’t walk without a significant limp, and definitely can’t run. Any fitness buffs know that sore-leg biz after leg day can be difficult to get around. At least know it’s a good pain. Now it’s just damage pain that will probably linger for a while. So long as it’s temporary, I can deal. Please be temporary.*
Some Cards my Mom Made
I still haven’t stopped moving since I got back in Canada. I’m guessing that being “trapped” in Canada won't fully sink in until I’m doing nothing all day and not leaving the house. This becomes a very real possibility when I find out my Dad’s truck is on its last legs and we only have one fully functional car. No wheels in a small town sounds alright until you realize how much country is around and there's an almost non-existent transit system.

As I’ve probably mentioned, I’m back to square one with the China jobs. They said it wasn’t going to work out. It’s not them, it’s me. yada yada. I reach out to the recruitment agent I’d been working through, and see what we can work out. I’d rather work daytime and have weekends off, but the only offers are nights and weekends starting in November. Looks like I’ll be here a while, so I might as well settle in and start looking for ways to make money. I’m thinking of things I can import from China, such as protective battery cases for cell phones. Seems like a pretty good idea, given how my phone dies partway through most days.

The Mentioned Battery Cases
But I’m putting that off. Today is the first day in the house where nothing is planned and I can play this game that I’ve been craving since getting to Melbourne. Fallout: New Vegas, in case you were wondering, which is normally a game I would avoid. Why? Because it requires concentration and sound. For the past long while, I’d been playing The Binding of Isaac because it’s just reaction and no necessary sound, then throw on an audiobook, and take occasional notes. It’s as productive as reading, and I’m gaming. Win.

My parents have different plans for the day. Some relatives and family friends are coming over and want to see me. I don’t want to see anyone, but just like when I was a kid, you still have to come and socialize. Nothing against the guests personally, just bad timing. I’d rather be sealed in a cave with electricity and internet connection.

I do socialize, however, and find it easier to speak to them than before I left. I’m 27 and yet I still felt that barrier between "younger people" and “adults.” It was an enjoyable dinner, excusing myself after an estimated appropriate time.

I’m still eating whatever I want and need to get that back on track. I decided I would go back to the slow carb approach the day after today. That’s what I had said to myself, at least. Looking at it from the perspective of today, I wonder whether 1) it’s worth it, 2) I can follow it, 3) what’s the point? It’s funny because the shitty food I’m eating makes it more difficult to view the change any differently. But, like Tyler Durden from fight club said: “As always, I’ll carry you - kicking and screaming - and in the end you’ll thank me.” My slow thinking will carry my fast thinking.

Just Chillin'
If you have any interest in psychology, which I'm guessing you do if you’re still following me, then check out the book Thinking, Fast and Slow by Daniel Kahneman. Fantastic book that will give you a solid foundation for the essentials in Psych. His perspective talks about our two systems of thinking, System 1 being fast, automatic, emotional, subconscious, while System 2 is slow, effortful, infrequent, logical, calculating - conscious. Applying it further: My emotions say a resounding NO to changing eating/life styles, while my logic and goals know I should. How Fun!


In closing, this is the last day I’ll write in an unbroken series. The next day will take place on September 11th, and will be released tomorrow. Bachelor Party, anyone?

Editing Music: Gimme that Ole Time Feel By Confused Bi-Product of a Misinformed Culture

*Is 27 old? It's still not 30... And 20-something guys are said to "bounce."

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